One thing that I know that's for sure, is that in this season of waiting, God is molding & shaping our character into the parents that He created us to be. I see God's hands at work in my heart. I think that if I had gotten pregnant soon after my wedding, like so many others, I would not have the heart for children as I do now. For over 8 years now, I've committed my life to serving & working with kids. God gave me a fresh perspective & humbled my heart to love & embrace the children around me as if they were my very own.

I was a Day Care Teacher, Nanny, Sunday School Teacher, baby sitter, & Children's Ministry Coordinator. God opened doors of opportunity for me to share the love I had stored in my heart with children around me. Before I even realized this, He was aligning everything already. I find His hands in everything that I do. He leads me into embracing children truly as a gift from God. I've gained so much wisdom and knowledge working in Early Childhood Education. 

I'm so grateful now for all that God has shown me. From how to nurture infants to how I can raise & care for children in a healthy environment. I've met so many great parents along the way. Parent's who invest in their children & understand the verse," Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."- Proverbs 22:6

I've had the opportunity to watch some of my closest friends & family parent their children. I can honestly say that it is not easy. I've yet to experience the heartaches & hardships it takes to be a parent. But God has given me this perspective to respect and honor parents who strive to live a Godly life that reflects His love even towards their own children. 

When I look at Roger & myself, I think to myself," We're not ready to have kids. We're still so immature in ways that need growing. We're not wise enough nor are we financially stable yet." Though these are lies of the enemy, we've learned that in this moment in time, God is chipping away at our hearts & building us up to be the parents He has called us to be someday. Whether it be to our own biological children or through adoption.

Honestly, no one will ever be ready. It's when you receive the blessing that you are tested in your faithfulness to God. When we choose to rely on Him, He will provide all that we need. Whether that be the wisdom to parent children or the pressure you'll face to become more refined & radiant or even to trust that He will provide for you daily as He does for the birds in the sky. (Matthew 6:26)

I see it. God gives me glimpses of the father that Roger will become. In moments like these, I celebrate what the Father is doing in our lives. Even if we've yet to receive our prayers. It brings me joy for I know that God is working all things for His glory & for our good. When the day comes, we know that God will have brought us out of the desert to receive His promise. We give thanks for the journey into the wilderness. No, we're not lost. And no, He hasn't deserted us. He's gently guiding us. We're enjoying the wilderness.  Here is where we found His love & His love covers us from the pain & sadness. 

Are there promises that you're holding on to? What are you still waiting for? 


  1. Beautiful!! I've had a lot of the same thoughts! I am so glad I didn't have kids with my ex-husband. I'm not sure if God will bless me with children and I am okay with that - He knows what's best and I rest in that. Bless you dear, beautiful child of God.


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